Caleb, 8 months

I guess it was time

So for the last two months Barney had really been going downhill. Several times I was thinking we would have to put him down but he always seemed to bounce back. Not two nights ago. He lost the use of his back legs, which had ahppened before. We would give him some Deromaxx, which is an inflamation reducer, and teh next day he would be up and going again. But this time he had been off his feed for a couple days and I couldn't get him to eat the pill. His gums, tounge and inner eyelids were white instead of pink which usually means heart failure, but when Bill, our vet, looked at him he said it was probably kidneys or liver because he wasn't panting heavily adn didn't have wateron his lungs. So we thought we'd leave him one more day and see how he looked in teh morning. I had decided if he wasn't a lot better I'd have Bill put him down.

Well, that night he started howling. I had just been up with Caleb and so I asked Ron to check on him. Ron got up, carried him outside to pee, carried him back inside and laid him on his bed and he died a few breaths later.

I knew something was wrong so I got up and Ron told me. I had thought I would be a wreck losing Barnabey, but I think all the ups and downs in his health had prepared me a bit. So now it just hits me every once in a while.

Barney had been with me through a lot of major events in my life, he's been with me longer than Ron! Just running my hands through his soft, thick coat was so comforting to me. We ended up burying him in the back yard. I'm going to miss that old dog.

What to do ....

Ron left in a frezied rush this morning. His friend, who is working up by Wapiti (about 45 mins from here) spotted a big herd of elk. I guess there are some massive bulls in there, so they're going to try and get a shot at them. Ron isn't exactly the traditional type hunter. Guys out here get horses and pack them miles and miles into the mountains and spend weeks hunting down elk. Elk are really spooky and tough to hunt. Ron is more of a jump on an opportunity, take a day and try to shoot an elk. If it's a bull great, but the meats all the same.
I took my hunter's safety course online, but missed the field day so I will have to take it again next year. I wanted to try for a deer.

So here I have the whole day before me. I have one grooming appointment this afternoon, and I really should be cleaning my house, but there's only so much cleaning I am motivated to do.

I've started a pair of chinks, so I will probably work on those. I've really enjoyed making them. I am going to tool the tops, so they will be kind of personalised too.

This one's for Nonni

Caleb at 7 months.

The weather outside is frightful

This morning I woke up to 2 inches of snow on the ground!! 2 Inches!!
Actually, it was pretty. The snow blocks so much noise that everything feels hushed and quiet. Ron isn't feeling well, so we started out the morning with hot tea on the couch enjoying the peace and beauty. I started getting these urges to decorate with lights and greenery, which puts me on the same schedual as WalMart.
I was planning to go to a horse auction today, but both Ron and I felt like the Lord is saying now is not the time. Which is an act of faith for me because horse prices are really low right now and with the snow will probably be even lower. And looking at the sale catalogue, there are some nice horses in this sale!
But I will wait. If anything, I've learned that waiting for the Lord's timing, while excruciating at times for this impatient girl, is for the best. My natural mode is to think of something to build/make/create/or buy and RIGHT NOW I want to make it happen. I like instant gratification!
Thinking of my mom and dad in Mexico, enjoying the sun and that certain feeling of being on a mission, of high and lofty goals, of helping people and seeing the results, the adventure, the sacrifice. Normally I would be really wanting to go, but not in this season of life. I'm happy being more settled. I so much love the uncertainty and adventure of travel, but I'm OK not being the one to go. At least for now.